March 20, 2023

RJ Rohini Ramnathan on her wedding ceremony day.

Mumbai-based radio jockey Rohini Ramnathan has opened up about coping with her husband’s sudden loss of life after 4 years of marriage. In an interview with Humans of Bombay, Ms Ramnathan mentioned that she went by means of a number of phases of grief – shock, anger, numbness – after studying of her husband Kaushik’s loss of life 4 years in the past. She drowned herself in work and sough remedy for her psychological well being. It was months earlier than she started to really feel like herself once more, she says. 

“I met Kaushik through common friends,” Ms Ramnathan remembers in her interview. “Being an RJ, I loved storytelling while he was a writer; we hit it off.”

The two began spending increasingly time collectively after their first assembly and finally began relationship. After three years of relationship, Kaushik proposed – a lot to Ms Ramnathan’s delight. “We were that couple who’d complete each other’s sentences. And so, after three years he asked me to marry him, I said ‘yes’!” she says.

The subsequent 4 years have been blissful ones for the couple, who travelled, kissed underneath the Eiffel Tower and “lived in love”. 

“We’d often dream of relocating to New York- it was his favourite city. But four years after we got married, Kaushik passed away… It was so sudden,” says Ms Ramnathan. 

The sudden lack of her husband left her reeling. “I felt so many emotions-shock, anger and then went numb. I wanted to block everything,” she says. After 14 days, she drowned herself in work and resumed capturing – although she was typically subjected to mean-spirited remarks from individuals questioning how she was up and about so quickly after her husband’s loss of life. 

“But while I was putting on a tough exterior during the day, every night I’d break down,” says Ms Ramnathan.

This sample continued for 10 months earlier than she sought remedy. “It took months before I started feeling like myself again,” the RJ says.

But even then, transferring ahead was not simple. Ms Ramnathan says that straightforward issues – like choosing out a sofa – turned arduous. ” And every time I filled out a form, I had to be conscious about choosing ‘single’ instead of ‘married’,” she provides. 

The hardest time for her, she says, was in New York. She visited town to grasp why Kaushik had beloved it a lot – however being there was “living the future we could never have.”

“I hated it,” she says. “But it was also important because being there made me embrace my emotions. Slowly, I started putting myself first; I knew Kaushik would have wanted that.”

Over time, she started to search out him in little issues – like his favorite dish, rasam chawal, or when she cracked a joke she knew he would have favored. 

“It’s been four years since he left us, but even today, if I’m stuck, I think about what he’d say and do exactly that,” says Ms Ramnathan. “We couldn’t have a forever but in our 7 years together, Kaushik gave me memories to last a lifetime. And they’ll keep me going until the day I meet him again,” she concludes. 

Ms Ramnathan’s touching account of affection and loss has struck a chord with social media customers. On Instagram and Facebook, her submit has racked up 1000’s of reactions and feedback.

“You have always been an extraordinary human being and an inspiration to so many. I don’t think one ever stops grieving the loss of a loved one but you have kept Kaushik alive within you,” wrote one commenter.

“So beautiful and emotional, got tears in my eyes. Stay strong,” one other mentioned. 

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